"Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; His love endures forever." - Psalm 107:1
Three years ago, I arrived home from a full day of college classes with a searing headache and a discouraged heart. Class had been anything but productive, I hadn’t done well on my test, and I honestly couldn’t remember the last time I had gotten a full nights sleep. Cheery voices greeted me as a kicked off my boots, slung my school bag over a chair, and flopped down on the couch feeling completely defeated.
“We’re making a Thanksgiving chain!” My younger sister called, “I’ve already made ten links! Want to help?” I didn’t want to be miserable. Some days I like being miserable, but this rainy, cold, November day wasn’t one of those times. I pulled myself off the couch, fixed a smile on my face and decided to count my blessings if it killed me. I really did want to be thankful, so I got to work hoping that before long I would feel gratefulness well up within me.
Making a yearly Thanksgiving chain has been a tradition in my family for as long as I can remember. By first cutting out strips of paper, then writing things we are thankful for on each strip, and finally looping them together to make a chain, my family remembers the blessings each year has brought. Everyone is expected to participate, regardless of bad test scores or headaches, so I grabbed a scrap of paper and sat down at the table to feel thankful. I starred at the piece of paper in my hands for a long time. I could easily think of things to write down. But I honestly didn’t feel thankful for any of it. All I could feel was how tired I was. How discouraged I was. I chastised myself and began to think of the wonderful things I had, the opportunities I was given, the faithfulness God had demonstrated towards me each year. I thought about all of it. I counted my blessings. And I didn’t feel anything that resembled thankfulness. My mind began to wander to the chatter around me.
“I’m thankful for turkey.”
“I’m thankful for chocolate. All of it!”
“I’m not thankful for my brother. He was annoying this morning.”
My mom’s voice cut in to the lively chattering, “That’s not a nice thing to say. We will be thankful for everyone in our family and we will put their names on the chain.”
The sibling who had spoken accepted her correction with a nod, and good natured laughter erupted as three people offered to put my brothers name on a link. I smiled at the thought that my mother had just commanded thankfulness, and was reminded that this is exactly what God does for me. In 1 Thessalonians 5:18, Paul reminds us “In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.” Not once does Paul ask us if we feel thankful. Nor does he tell us to conjure up feelings of gratefulness when struggles and heartache arise. Instead, Paul tells us to be thankful, even when we may not feel like it.
It is easy for me to rely on my emotions and assume that I can’t be thankful if my feelings don’t cooperate. I try to manufacture feelings of gratefulness in my heart so that I can be a “good christian”, and in the process I often let my emotions keep me from living out God’s command. Expressing gratitude is an action, not an emotion. It’s nice when we experience feelings of thankfulness, but the emotion isn’t necessary to truly be thankful. It is the action that matters
Being thankful can take on a variety of forms. It could mean choosing to trust God when you don’t have all the answers, giving to others because you yourself have been blessed, or telling people about the wonders of God’s grace in your life even when you are experiencing loneliness or pain.
It has been three years since God first showed me His command to be thankful through a Thanksgiving chain, and once again I find myself with a lack of emotion as I approach my favorite holiday. The blissful feeling that everything is right with the world hasn’t come yet, and it may not ever embrace me this season. But I still look forward to Thanksgiving with a mind full of gratitude and a determination to live out my thankfulness each day. Even when I don't feel thankful, I will be thankful.
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